Search This Blog

Sunday, March 16, 2014

Keeping the Lady's Weapon in Her Holster

Jeanne Robertson tells a story about her husband "Left Brain" going to the grocery store and making a serious mistake. She tells it funny and like every woman alive she remembers every detail of the incident. Like most women she has a photographic memory for every mistake that poor man's ever made in his life complete with date, time, temperature and map coordinates - every detail vividly recorded in such a way that he looks completely stupid. 

Somehow women manage to keep a vast collection of such embarrassing incidents slung somewhere inside their brains in some kind of mental holster where they can whip them out in a split second, whenever they need them to win an argument with their virtually unarmed husbands who have either forgotten any such incidents in which their wives figure prominently or simply dare not retrieve them for fear she might exercise the nuclear option. Married men, you understand. Unmarried men, you don't want to know.

I believe that this asymmetrical distribution of forces between men and women is one of the primary reasons why men like my grandpa, who in their youth were talkative enough fellows, eventually lapse into a laconic quietude as they ages. 

One does what one can to keep Mama's weapons in the holster.

© 2014 by Tom King

No comments: