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Wednesday, July 04, 2007

Who Are the Jedi Anyway?

The History Channel has been running a special on the political and social ramifications of Star Wars lately. It's fascinating - especially the part where they compare George Bush and the Iraq War to the Evil Emperor and the betrayal of the Jedi.

Well, you knew that was coming. The problem with that is that the Star Wars Rise-of-the-Evil-Emporer / Rise-of-George-Bush metaphor breaks down really quickly when you take a look at it. Here's how.

1. The Evil Emperor is for larger government.
Republican George Bush keeps talking about shrinking government.
Now who is it that wants to increase taxes, expand the bureaucracy and insinuate the government into everything from health care to education to what you can say on the radio?

2. The Evil Emperor started out as a senator, is an expert politician, discredited and marginalized former chancellor Valorum and skillfully maneuvered his fellow senators into granting him unlimited power.
President George Bush started out as a governor, not a Washington insider, has been derided as stupid, transparent and has been skillfully marginalized by political opponents and the media to the point that Democrat senators keep trying to call for a vote of "no confidence" at the least or to impeach him at worst - kind of like what happened to the Old Republic's Chancellor Valorum.
Now just who was behind discrediting the Republic's chancellor in Star Wars and who is behind discrediting the Republican President in the US Congress?

Starting to become clearer?

3. The Evil Emperor started up a war to deliberately draw attention away from his own lies and machinations back at home and to lead the Jedi into a trap and reduce their numbers.
While George has been charged with the same thing by his opponents, let's also remember that he's a true believer that terrorism must be fought where the terrorists live instead of waiting for them to come over here again - an idea that makes a strange kind of sense when you think about it.
BUT, who was it that when he got caught lying, all of a sudden decided to start up a little war in the Balkans - entirely coincidentally, of course to draw attention away from his own perjury and foolin' around with the White House help? AND isn't it interesting how quickly some folks came up with the idea that Bush was using a war to consolidate his power. It's like there's a script out there and everyone of them is saying the same thing like mindless drones, accusing a president who's been trying to respond to the most devestating terrorist attack on the United States in history of playing cheap politics. These guys have even accused him of staging the attack himself? And who was that who came up with that ludicrous scenario? The same guys that ran Vietnam out of the White House and hamstrung our troops in the field so badly, that the most powerful Army in the world was reduced to impotence against a far less powerful bush league peasant mob. The same guys that have proven devestatingly adept at creating crises for the purpose of getting elected.

4. Finally, the Jedi! Who are they? These are wise and powerful knights who protect the Old Empire, defend freedom and promote independence and limited government. They are respected by ordinary people, but are badly outnumbered by the forces of evil who seek to silence them forever.

Now who is it who leads the fight for the constitution, the Republic, freedom and limited government, even against those who once believed as they did and have fallen away, seduced by the power of the dark side, uh I mean the power of being a big deal in government. Who holds an almost mystical power that holds back the power of those who would make government bigger, more intrusive, more controlling of all aspects of our lives. Who would the forces of darkness like to silence. Who would they like to take all the power away from? Who is the target of the Fairness Doctrine Proposal - a law that would make a certain type of media financially impossible to maintain?

Oh, my...

I think I know.

The Jedi Knights are.....................................................Talk Radio!

Who woulda thunk it?

Sir Rush, Sir Sean and Sir Glenn - the US's own Jedi. These boys better watch their backs, that's all I can say. The Clone Wars have already started.

By the way, have you noticed how much all the presidential candidates are alike. Nobody really stands out from the pack. Clones, that's what they are!

Hey, if they start pinching interns on the butt, we'll know who the template was.

Now, if we can just get Sir Fred to run....

Just one man's opinion.....


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